No. 90

Hooray (pre)teen angst! One review-- fictionpress seems to censor everything.
and if theyy get me (2005-06-07): "i think i've read this before.. its really really good. youre an amazing writer, danny. its.. angry.. damn u were **."

Crap i just saved over it for spelling and lost the modified date. Lesson learned.
http://www.fictionpress.com/s/1933822/1/Beating_on_a_Pillow (06-07-05)

Beating on a Pillow

Why am I here?
Because of you
Because I hate you.
Because I'd have to be perfect
and not want a thing
to satisfy you
You control my life
You've made me depend on you
and blind me without good reason
I'm not allowed to get mad
But here I am and I hate you
My anger brews silent
while the hate screams in my head
I dreamed I was mute every time I wanted to scream
Because I cannot scream at you
Oh I wish I had a knife
I want to scream so loud I spit in your face
Until you could feel the scream like a knife
twisting under your ribs
disorienting you
What if I ran away?
have you ever thought about what's stopping me?
You give me your damn reasons
your excuses just plain lame
I'm afraid you'll just take more of my life away
So here I lay
You don't even know me
Your own son
Who are you?
What if I grew past these fears?
could I face you with a gun?
would you ever see behind these tears?
or will I choose to run?
So i'm forced to lie here
Sick of what you said
Suffocating in blankets and sheets
beating on this pillow..
..Oh, how I wish it was your head.

This one has one review and it appears it as an apology poem. Not positive for who or sure what for though.

andiftheyygetme (2005-06-11): "this is really good"

Not sure why she posted anonymously. It appears to be an apology poem although i'm not positive for who or sure for what.

Modified: Tue 07 Jun 2005 09:11:24 PM EDT
http://www.fictionpress.com/s/1933837/1/Heatless (06-07-05)

Heartless
(The Way Things Were Meant to Be)

I'm sorry

It wasn't you

I cannot see

Was it me

or just the way that things

were simply meant to be

 

I cried to the clouds

they heard my painful plea

and in return I got change

and it was that which set me free

So now I learn what I thought I knew

Be careful what you wish to be

And now I'm free

but I can't see

As I wonder

Who ever said

The way things were truly meant to be...

But this is me,

And I really am sorry.